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Faceless
The Second Collection
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Dec 2011
[561] 23: I found out what my husband bought me for Christmas
12466 Current Rating: 12466 + 13723 = 26189 votesCurrent Rating: 12466 + 13723 = 26189 votes 13723

[560] 22: Another Viagra advert on TV
14857 Current Rating: 14857 + 16062 = 30919 votesCurrent Rating: 14857 + 16062 = 30919 votes 16062

[559] 21: It is so hard for women
9937 Current Rating: 9937 + 10784 = 20721 votesCurrent Rating: 9937 + 10784 = 20721 votes 10784

[558] 20: Give me a double anything
15656 Current Rating: 15656 + 17345 = 33001 votesCurrent Rating: 15656 + 17345 = 33001 votes 17345

[557] 19: Save a cow
10948 Current Rating: 10948 + 13621 = 24569 votesCurrent Rating: 10948 + 13621 = 24569 votes 13621

[556] 15: You know the idiom
31115 Current Rating: 31115 + 30193 = 61308 votesCurrent Rating: 31115 + 30193 = 61308 votes 30193

[555] 14: I am here to fulfil your
20460 Current Rating: 20460 + 22669 = 43129 votesCurrent Rating: 20460 + 22669 = 43129 votes 22669

[554] 13: I heard you dumped your boyfriend
28359 Current Rating: 28359 + 36400 = 64759 votesCurrent Rating: 28359 + 36400 = 64759 votes 36400

[553] 12: Modern industry is so inconsiderate
26754 Current Rating: 26754 + 28419 = 55173 votesCurrent Rating: 26754 + 28419 = 55173 votes 28419

[552] 9: Bugger, what happened to you?
29526 Current Rating: 29526 + 33308 = 62834 votesCurrent Rating: 29526 + 33308 = 62834 votes 33308

[551] 8: I`m off, see you tomorrow
24746 Current Rating: 24746 + 27178 = 51924 votesCurrent Rating: 24746 + 27178 = 51924 votes 27178

[550] 7: My wife is like an alarm clock
14031 Current Rating: 14031 + 14626 = 28657 votesCurrent Rating: 14031 + 14626 = 28657 votes 14626

[549] 6: Can I buy you a drink?
12519 Current Rating: 12519 + 13777 = 26296 votesCurrent Rating: 12519 + 13777 = 26296 votes 13777

[548] 5: Mom, can we get a kitten
12953 Current Rating: 12953 + 14296 = 27249 votesCurrent Rating: 12953 + 14296 = 27249 votes 14296

[547] 1: I think all of those people
28382 Current Rating: 28382 + 31965 = 60347 votesCurrent Rating: 28382 + 31965 = 60347 votes 31965


Nov 2011
[546] 30: Do you know what the worst thing in the world is?
19553 Current Rating: 19553 + 22000 = 41553 votesCurrent Rating: 19553 + 22000 = 41553 votes 22000

[545] 29: Hi bud, how are you doing?
12586 Current Rating: 12586 + 11730 = 24316 votesCurrent Rating: 12586 + 11730 = 24316 votes 11730

[544] 25: This political correctness is getting out of hand
16283 Current Rating: 16283 + 18565 = 34848 votesCurrent Rating: 16283 + 18565 = 34848 votes 18565

[543] 24: The more I get to understand men
20168 Current Rating: 20168 + 21810 = 41978 votesCurrent Rating: 20168 + 21810 = 41978 votes 21810

[542] 23: Have you noticed
13582 Current Rating: 13582 + 12791 = 26373 votesCurrent Rating: 13582 + 12791 = 26373 votes 12791

[541] 22: I can’t believe it
21154 Current Rating: 21154 + 21076 = 42230 votesCurrent Rating: 21154 + 21076 = 42230 votes 21076

[540] 21: How did you get the black eye?
19756 Current Rating: 19756 + 20450 = 40206 votesCurrent Rating: 19756 + 20450 = 40206 votes 20450

[539] 18: Happy birthday darling
29644 Current Rating: 29644 + 33492 = 63136 votesCurrent Rating: 29644 + 33492 = 63136 votes 33492

[538] 17: A real man
13895 Current Rating: 13895 + 14898 = 28793 votesCurrent Rating: 13895 + 14898 = 28793 votes 14898

[537] 16: I heard that he is a very successful man
24200 Current Rating: 24200 + 26225 = 50425 votesCurrent Rating: 24200 + 26225 = 50425 votes 26225

[536] 15: Why do I always have to do the cooking?
20903 Current Rating: 20903 + 23363 = 44266 votesCurrent Rating: 20903 + 23363 = 44266 votes 23363

[535] 14: You look furious, what is going on?
23531 Current Rating: 23531 + 25965 = 49496 votesCurrent Rating: 23531 + 25965 = 49496 votes 25965

[534] 11: Thanks Google
23684 Current Rating: 23684 + 25888 = 49572 votesCurrent Rating: 23684 + 25888 = 49572 votes 25888

[533] 10: Dad, I have a homework question
20972 Current Rating: 20972 + 23037 = 44009 votesCurrent Rating: 20972 + 23037 = 44009 votes 23037

[532] 9: Look at that guy opening the car door for her
19280 Current Rating: 19280 + 21082 = 40362 votesCurrent Rating: 19280 + 21082 = 40362 votes 21082

[531] 8: I often wonder why alcohol was ever invented
9911 Current Rating: 9911 + 9453 = 19364 votesCurrent Rating: 9911 + 9453 = 19364 votes 9453

[530] 7: I heard you got dumped by your girlfriend
10028 Current Rating: 10028 + 9329 = 19357 votesCurrent Rating: 10028 + 9329 = 19357 votes 9329

[529] 4: That`s a nice new phone
11772 Current Rating: 11772 + 11604 = 23376 votesCurrent Rating: 11772 + 11604 = 23376 votes 11604

[528] 3: I was down at the security shop
9141 Current Rating: 9141 + 10038 = 19179 votesCurrent Rating: 9141 + 10038 = 19179 votes 10038

[527] 2: Good morning, how can I help you?
11570 Current Rating: 11570 + 12968 = 24538 votesCurrent Rating: 11570 + 12968 = 24538 votes 12968

[526] 1: I was watching my 8 year old son
8761 Current Rating: 8761 + 8087 = 16848 votesCurrent Rating: 8761 + 8087 = 16848 votes 8087


Oct 2011
[525] 31: Why do people say
9844 Current Rating: 9844 + 10131 = 19975 votesCurrent Rating: 9844 + 10131 = 19975 votes 10131

[524] 28: YOU will make supper for a change
10112 Current Rating: 10112 + 11214 = 21326 votesCurrent Rating: 10112 + 11214 = 21326 votes 11214

[523] 27: I have to be in court on Monday
11812 Current Rating: 11812 + 12056 = 23868 votesCurrent Rating: 11812 + 12056 = 23868 votes 12056

[522] 26: Hey babe
9560 Current Rating: 9560 + 9440 = 19000 votesCurrent Rating: 9560 + 9440 = 19000 votes 9440

[521] 25: Facebook asks me what I
13476 Current Rating: 13476 + 13265 = 26741 votesCurrent Rating: 13476 + 13265 = 26741 votes 13265

[520] 24: My wife is so fat
14065 Current Rating: 14065 + 15600 = 29665 votesCurrent Rating: 14065 + 15600 = 29665 votes 15600

[519] 21: I got banned from the disco
31969 Current Rating: 31969 + 32765 = 64734 votesCurrent Rating: 31969 + 32765 = 64734 votes 32765

[518] 20: Are you coming out tonight?
17697 Current Rating: 17697 + 19740 = 37437 votesCurrent Rating: 17697 + 19740 = 37437 votes 19740

[517] 19: I watched a disturbing documentary last night
22128 Current Rating: 22128 + 24715 = 46843 votesCurrent Rating: 22128 + 24715 = 46843 votes 24715

[516] 18: I am in deep trouble again
20428 Current Rating: 20428 + 22863 = 43291 votesCurrent Rating: 20428 + 22863 = 43291 votes 22863

[515] 17: Its going to be hell this winter
34932 Current Rating: 34932 + 34996 = 69928 votesCurrent Rating: 34932 + 34996 = 69928 votes 34996

[514] 14: I`ve bought you six drinks already tonight
51142 Current Rating: 51142 + 53182 = 104324 votesCurrent Rating: 51142 + 53182 = 104324 votes 53182

[513] 13: Smoking is bad for you
36183 Current Rating: 36183 + 36045 = 72228 votesCurrent Rating: 36183 + 36045 = 72228 votes 36045

[512] 12: Take away all of the vowels
20919 Current Rating: 20919 + 22142 = 43061 votesCurrent Rating: 20919 + 22142 = 43061 votes 22142

[511] 11: What the hell!?!
42471 Current Rating: 42471 + 45442 = 87913 votesCurrent Rating: 42471 + 45442 = 87913 votes 45442

[510] 10: Please phone the sperm bank
17563 Current Rating: 17563 + 17539 = 35102 votesCurrent Rating: 17563 + 17539 = 35102 votes 17539

[509] 7: I need to get out of the relationship I’m in
42010 Current Rating: 42010 + 47941 = 89951 votesCurrent Rating: 42010 + 47941 = 89951 votes 47941

[508] 6: It’s been three weeks since the accident
13629 Current Rating: 13629 + 14956 = 28585 votesCurrent Rating: 13629 + 14956 = 28585 votes 14956

[507] 5: These ads on TV for Viagra are stupid
21762 Current Rating: 21762 + 23914 = 45676 votesCurrent Rating: 21762 + 23914 = 45676 votes 23914

[506] 4: I heard you were in trouble with the law
17467 Current Rating: 17467 + 19054 = 36521 votesCurrent Rating: 17467 + 19054 = 36521 votes 19054

[505] 3: I`d like you to meet my little friend
16517 Current Rating: 16517 + 17614 = 34131 votesCurrent Rating: 16517 + 17614 = 34131 votes 17614


Sep 2011
[504] 30: Hey babe, why don’t you come over here
35555 Current Rating: 35555 + 37630 = 73185 votesCurrent Rating: 35555 + 37630 = 73185 votes 37630

[503] 29: You’ve been walking strangely
12428 Current Rating: 12428 + 11849 = 24277 votesCurrent Rating: 12428 + 11849 = 24277 votes 11849

[502] 28: Will you please bring me a beer
11093 Current Rating: 11093 + 11729 = 22822 votesCurrent Rating: 11093 + 11729 = 22822 votes 11729

[501] 27: You`ve been sulking for an hour now, what’s wrong?
16354 Current Rating: 16354 + 18658 = 35012 votesCurrent Rating: 16354 + 18658 = 35012 votes 18658

[500] 26: What do you call that fatty bit
13460 Current Rating: 13460 + 15214 = 28674 votesCurrent Rating: 13460 + 15214 = 28674 votes 15214

[499] 23: You need to cut down
14750 Current Rating: 14750 + 16629 = 31379 votesCurrent Rating: 14750 + 16629 = 31379 votes 16629

[498] 22: My wife has a terrible hangover
11683 Current Rating: 11683 + 10928 = 22611 votesCurrent Rating: 11683 + 10928 = 22611 votes 10928

[497] 21: A little girl knocked on my door this morning
13804 Current Rating: 13804 + 12888 = 26692 votesCurrent Rating: 13804 + 12888 = 26692 votes 12888

[496] 20: Johnny Walker, single
14102 Current Rating: 14102 + 13563 = 27665 votesCurrent Rating: 14102 + 13563 = 27665 votes 13563

[495] 19: You’ll never guess what happened to me
25577 Current Rating: 25577 + 30044 = 55621 votesCurrent Rating: 25577 + 30044 = 55621 votes 30044

[494] 16: I’m so lucky my husband’s an angel
23108 Current Rating: 23108 + 24573 = 47681 votesCurrent Rating: 23108 + 24573 = 47681 votes 24573

[493] 15: Are you going to be long?
16631 Current Rating: 16631 + 18420 = 35051 votesCurrent Rating: 16631 + 18420 = 35051 votes 18420

[492] 14: The divorce proceedings are underway
16424 Current Rating: 16424 + 17598 = 34022 votesCurrent Rating: 16424 + 17598 = 34022 votes 17598

[491] 13: We both got parts in the Christmas pageant
15451 Current Rating: 15451 + 16004 = 31455 votesCurrent Rating: 15451 + 16004 = 31455 votes 16004

[490] 12: MWWAAAHHH!
12836 Current Rating: 12836 + 14735 = 27571 votesCurrent Rating: 12836 + 14735 = 27571 votes 14735

[489] 9: Have you ever been to a sex shop?
29812 Current Rating: 29812 + 31356 = 61168 votesCurrent Rating: 29812 + 31356 = 61168 votes 31356

[488] 8: I went to the gynaecologist
21040 Current Rating: 21040 + 21952 = 42992 votesCurrent Rating: 21040 + 21952 = 42992 votes 21952

[487] 7: Faceless supports the Springboks!
15710 Current Rating: 15710 + 17503 = 33213 votesCurrent Rating: 15710 + 17503 = 33213 votes 17503

[486] 6: I’m ready, we can go
19391 Current Rating: 19391 + 21347 = 40738 votesCurrent Rating: 19391 + 21347 = 40738 votes 21347

[485] 5: I’ve called my wife beautiful
18615 Current Rating: 18615 + 20690 = 39305 votesCurrent Rating: 18615 + 20690 = 39305 votes 20690

[484] 2: You said you were going to complain
38541 Current Rating: 38541 + 41798 = 80339 votesCurrent Rating: 38541 + 41798 = 80339 votes 41798

[483] 1: With you being over two metres tall
16872 Current Rating: 16872 + 18710 = 35582 votesCurrent Rating: 16872 + 18710 = 35582 votes 18710


Aug 2011
[482] 31: You look tired
19288 Current Rating: 19288 + 21237 = 40525 votesCurrent Rating: 19288 + 21237 = 40525 votes 21237

[481] 30: Since I first laid eyes on you
21410 Current Rating: 21410 + 21119 = 42529 votesCurrent Rating: 21410 + 21119 = 42529 votes 21119

[480] 29: I love Edward Cullen
26803 Current Rating: 26803 + 24185 = 50988 votesCurrent Rating: 26803 + 24185 = 50988 votes 24185

[479] 26: Have you seen my broom anywhere?
34524 Current Rating: 34524 + 35885 = 70409 votesCurrent Rating: 34524 + 35885 = 70409 votes 35885

[478] 25: My gay son introduced my wife and I
30760 Current Rating: 30760 + 29989 = 60749 votesCurrent Rating: 30760 + 29989 = 60749 votes 29989

[477] 24: Happy birthday Dad
41447 Current Rating: 41447 + 45081 = 86528 votesCurrent Rating: 41447 + 45081 = 86528 votes 45081

[476] 23: I heard you broke up with your boyfriend
18822 Current Rating: 18822 + 20557 = 39379 votesCurrent Rating: 18822 + 20557 = 39379 votes 20557

[475] 22: Do you believe in psychics?
18252 Current Rating: 18252 + 20130 = 38382 votesCurrent Rating: 18252 + 20130 = 38382 votes 20130

[474] 19: My wife is suing me for a divorce
34798 Current Rating: 34798 + 36103 = 70901 votesCurrent Rating: 34798 + 36103 = 70901 votes 36103

[473] 18: I haven’t seen you around in months
22018 Current Rating: 22018 + 25272 = 47290 votesCurrent Rating: 22018 + 25272 = 47290 votes 25272

[472] 17: I’m from the orphanage in town
28865 Current Rating: 28865 + 30074 = 58939 votesCurrent Rating: 28865 + 30074 = 58939 votes 30074

[471] 16: I was shagging this bird
20978 Current Rating: 20978 + 22449 = 43427 votesCurrent Rating: 20978 + 22449 = 43427 votes 22449

[470] 15: Now that we’re engaged
26093 Current Rating: 26093 + 28563 = 54656 votesCurrent Rating: 26093 + 28563 = 54656 votes 28563

[469] 12: You lying, cheating bastard
14905 Current Rating: 14905 + 16315 = 31220 votesCurrent Rating: 14905 + 16315 = 31220 votes 16315

[468] 11: I think I’m getting old
13634 Current Rating: 13634 + 14906 = 28540 votesCurrent Rating: 13634 + 14906 = 28540 votes 14906

[467] 10: I can’t believe you missed that putt
13366 Current Rating: 13366 + 14623 = 27989 votesCurrent Rating: 13366 + 14623 = 27989 votes 14623

[466] 5: Hi there gorgeous
17358 Current Rating: 17358 + 18453 = 35811 votesCurrent Rating: 17358 + 18453 = 35811 votes 18453

[465] 4: I discovered three things today
13443 Current Rating: 13443 + 14244 = 27687 votesCurrent Rating: 13443 + 14244 = 27687 votes 14244

[464] 3: You know, I love oral sex
13051 Current Rating: 13051 + 16080 = 29131 votesCurrent Rating: 13051 + 16080 = 29131 votes 16080

[463] 2: Happy Anniversary! How long is it now?
13303 Current Rating: 13303 + 16453 = 29756 votesCurrent Rating: 13303 + 16453 = 29756 votes 16453

[462] 1: Things seem a bit frosty here today
23202 Current Rating: 23202 + 25391 = 48593 votesCurrent Rating: 23202 + 25391 = 48593 votes 25391


Jul 2011
[461] 29: I heard you have to go to court, why?
19064 Current Rating: 19064 + 20702 = 39766 votesCurrent Rating: 19064 + 20702 = 39766 votes 20702

[460] 28: So your wife told my wife
13056 Current Rating: 13056 + 15025 = 28081 votesCurrent Rating: 13056 + 15025 = 28081 votes 15025

[459] 27: Good morning Professor
9395 Current Rating: 9395 + 10190 = 19585 votesCurrent Rating: 9395 + 10190 = 19585 votes 10190

[458] 26: So what do the results say doctor?
12282 Current Rating: 12282 + 17020 = 29302 votesCurrent Rating: 12282 + 17020 = 29302 votes 17020

[457] 25: I realised that my wife
11038 Current Rating: 11038 + 13809 = 24847 votesCurrent Rating: 11038 + 13809 = 24847 votes 13809

[456] 22: I’ve met that most wonderful, sexy, intelligent woman
14078 Current Rating: 14078 + 15181 = 29259 votesCurrent Rating: 14078 + 15181 = 29259 votes 15181

[455] 21: We are gathered here today
18442 Current Rating: 18442 + 44117 = 62559 votesCurrent Rating: 18442 + 44117 = 62559 votes 44117

[454] 20: You look flipping angry
9510 Current Rating: 9510 + 9033 = 18543 votesCurrent Rating: 9510 + 9033 = 18543 votes 9033

[453] 19: That’s just disgusting ...
12300 Current Rating: 12300 + 15563 = 27863 votesCurrent Rating: 12300 + 15563 = 27863 votes 15563

[452] 18: I think you should see a doctor
11011 Current Rating: 11011 + 9939 = 20950 votesCurrent Rating: 11011 + 9939 = 20950 votes 9939

[451] 15: You women are so vain
7799 Current Rating: 7799 + 6665 = 14464 votesCurrent Rating: 7799 + 6665 = 14464 votes 6665

[450] 14: Did you know that 95% of women masturbate
12799 Current Rating: 12799 + 15484 = 28283 votesCurrent Rating: 12799 + 15484 = 28283 votes 15484

[449] 13: So you’re crying again
12197 Current Rating: 12197 + 17126 = 29323 votesCurrent Rating: 12197 + 17126 = 29323 votes 17126

[448] 12: She’s hot
12846 Current Rating: 12846 + 13502 = 26348 votesCurrent Rating: 12846 + 13502 = 26348 votes 13502

[447] 11: You know we have many terms for male masturbation
10956 Current Rating: 10956 + 10340 = 21296 votesCurrent Rating: 10956 + 10340 = 21296 votes 10340

[446] 8: So beautiful, what do you do for a living?
9227 Current Rating: 9227 + 9947 = 19174 votesCurrent Rating: 9227 + 9947 = 19174 votes 9947

[445] 7: Hi, I’m from tech support
15059 Current Rating: 15059 + 16988 = 32047 votesCurrent Rating: 15059 + 16988 = 32047 votes 16988

[444] 6: Dad, does a lawyer ever tell the truth?
8508 Current Rating: 8508 + 7805 = 16313 votesCurrent Rating: 8508 + 7805 = 16313 votes 7805

[443] 5: You’re in the video game, I need a favour
13340 Current Rating: 13340 + 13947 = 27287 votesCurrent Rating: 13340 + 13947 = 27287 votes 13947

[442] 4: A woman marries a man
12353 Current Rating: 12353 + 14094 = 26447 votesCurrent Rating: 12353 + 14094 = 26447 votes 14094

[441] 1: You look buggered, rough night last night?
26184 Current Rating: 26184 + 29029 = 55213 votesCurrent Rating: 26184 + 29029 = 55213 votes 29029


Jun 2011
[440] 29: I’m really not happy
10792 Current Rating: 10792 + 10003 = 20795 votesCurrent Rating: 10792 + 10003 = 20795 votes 10003

[439] 28: My condolences, I heard your husband passed away
12805 Current Rating: 12805 + 15351 = 28156 votesCurrent Rating: 12805 + 15351 = 28156 votes 15351

[438] 27: I found a new "feminine hygiene" product
16237 Current Rating: 16237 + 16277 = 32514 votesCurrent Rating: 16237 + 16277 = 32514 votes 16277

[437] 24: Hi there, can I buy you a drink?
46278 Current Rating: 46278 + 47091 = 93369 votesCurrent Rating: 46278 + 47091 = 93369 votes 47091

[436] 23: You look like you could chew rocks
23761 Current Rating: 23761 + 26088 = 49849 votesCurrent Rating: 23761 + 26088 = 49849 votes 26088

[435] 22: We live in such dangerous and uncertain times
9054 Current Rating: 9054 + 9984 = 19038 votesCurrent Rating: 9054 + 9984 = 19038 votes 9984

[434] 21: If you went camping
15610 Current Rating: 15610 + 15186 = 30796 votesCurrent Rating: 15610 + 15186 = 30796 votes 15186

[433] 20: Hey babsh, you"re looking fantashtic tonight
31105 Current Rating: 31105 + 39438 = 70543 votesCurrent Rating: 31105 + 39438 = 70543 votes 39438

[432] 15: Welcome to the Fitness Gym
23277 Current Rating: 23277 + 30796 = 54073 votesCurrent Rating: 23277 + 30796 = 54073 votes 30796

[431] 14: I saw a news program
17508 Current Rating: 17508 + 18513 = 36021 votesCurrent Rating: 17508 + 18513 = 36021 votes 18513

[430] 13: I can’t find my wife anywhere
12931 Current Rating: 12931 + 14353 = 27284 votesCurrent Rating: 12931 + 14353 = 27284 votes 14353

[429] 10: I bought my wife a Memory Stick
9614 Current Rating: 9614 + 9052 = 18666 votesCurrent Rating: 9614 + 9052 = 18666 votes 9052

[428] 9: Today’s lesson is about the Bible
16894 Current Rating: 16894 + 24782 = 41676 votesCurrent Rating: 16894 + 24782 = 41676 votes 24782

[427] 8: Darling, do I please you in bed?
11334 Current Rating: 11334 + 13434 = 24768 votesCurrent Rating: 11334 + 13434 = 24768 votes 13434

[426] 7: I got into huge trouble with the wife
10179 Current Rating: 10179 + 9514 = 19693 votesCurrent Rating: 10179 + 9514 = 19693 votes 9514

[425] 6: My wife left me last Wednesday
20745 Current Rating: 20745 + 20859 = 41604 votesCurrent Rating: 20745 + 20859 = 41604 votes 20859

[424] 3: Doctor, I’ve got a green spot
9072 Current Rating: 9072 + 9936 = 19008 votesCurrent Rating: 9072 + 9936 = 19008 votes 9936

[423] 2: Good morning, this is Hospitality Hotel
11961 Current Rating: 11961 + 13186 = 25147 votesCurrent Rating: 11961 + 13186 = 25147 votes 13186

[422] 1: You logged a call for IT support
10509 Current Rating: 10509 + 12876 = 23385 votesCurrent Rating: 10509 + 12876 = 23385 votes 12876


May 2011
[421] 31: Dad! What are you doing to mom?
10856 Current Rating: 10856 + 10376 = 21232 votesCurrent Rating: 10856 + 10376 = 21232 votes 10376

[420] 30: My girlfriend and I were in bed
11476 Current Rating: 11476 + 15303 = 26779 votesCurrent Rating: 11476 + 15303 = 26779 votes 15303

[419] 27: You reported your wife missing
3842 Current Rating: 3842 + 3355 = 7197 votesCurrent Rating: 3842 + 3355 = 7197 votes 3355

[418] 26: Dad, how much does it cost to get married?
10279 Current Rating: 10279 + 12266 = 22545 votesCurrent Rating: 10279 + 12266 = 22545 votes 12266

[417] 25: When you die, you get reincarnated
10388 Current Rating: 10388 + 9510 = 19898 votesCurrent Rating: 10388 + 9510 = 19898 votes 9510

[416] 24: My wife is so stupid
10178 Current Rating: 10178 + 12041 = 22219 votesCurrent Rating: 10178 + 12041 = 22219 votes 12041

[415] 23: Went for my routine check up today
15151 Current Rating: 15151 + 18254 = 33405 votesCurrent Rating: 15151 + 18254 = 33405 votes 18254

[414] 20: My girlfriend thinks that I
15523 Current Rating: 15523 + 17852 = 33375 votesCurrent Rating: 15523 + 17852 = 33375 votes 17852

[413] 19: I hate the flipping internet!
17225 Current Rating: 17225 + 19466 = 36691 votesCurrent Rating: 17225 + 19466 = 36691 votes 19466

[412] 17: Emergency services, how can I help you?
13224 Current Rating: 13224 + 16963 = 30187 votesCurrent Rating: 13224 + 16963 = 30187 votes 16963

[411] 16: I got so embarrassed
14629 Current Rating: 14629 + 15169 = 29798 votesCurrent Rating: 14629 + 15169 = 29798 votes 15169

[410] 13: You’re looking up-beat today
13890 Current Rating: 13890 + 15425 = 29315 votesCurrent Rating: 13890 + 15425 = 29315 votes 15425

[409] 12: Welcome to Incredible Ice-Cream Parlour
12560 Current Rating: 12560 + 16797 = 29357 votesCurrent Rating: 12560 + 16797 = 29357 votes 16797

[408] 11: I`m 79 years old now
11722 Current Rating: 11722 + 11175 = 22897 votesCurrent Rating: 11722 + 11175 = 22897 votes 11175

[407] 10: I met a girl in the park
13190 Current Rating: 13190 + 14690 = 27880 votesCurrent Rating: 13190 + 14690 = 27880 votes 14690

[406] 9: Dad, I hear you
12442 Current Rating: 12442 + 13961 = 26403 votesCurrent Rating: 12442 + 13961 = 26403 votes 13961

[405] 6: Are you growing a moustache
22040 Current Rating: 22040 + 23954 = 45994 votesCurrent Rating: 22040 + 23954 = 45994 votes 23954

[404] 5: Hi doc, I need a medical clearance
12958 Current Rating: 12958 + 14472 = 27430 votesCurrent Rating: 12958 + 14472 = 27430 votes 14472

[403] 4: Hello Gran, I started school
8295 Current Rating: 8295 + 10563 = 18858 votesCurrent Rating: 8295 + 10563 = 18858 votes 10563

[402] 3: Thanks for posting my bail
10884 Current Rating: 10884 + 12293 = 23177 votesCurrent Rating: 10884 + 12293 = 23177 votes 12293


Apr 2011
[401] 21: Good morning, I’m from IT support
21927 Current Rating: 21927 + 22994 = 44921 votesCurrent Rating: 21927 + 22994 = 44921 votes 22994

[400] 20: I just hired an Eastern European cleaner
18110 Current Rating: 18110 + 18394 = 36504 votesCurrent Rating: 18110 + 18394 = 36504 votes 18394

[399] 19: Welcome Fine Dinning Restaurant
12551 Current Rating: 12551 + 13910 = 26461 votesCurrent Rating: 12551 + 13910 = 26461 votes 13910

[398] 18: What is it when a man talks
21180 Current Rating: 21180 + 23238 = 44418 votesCurrent Rating: 21180 + 23238 = 44418 votes 23238

[397] 15: I Love you
45234 Current Rating: 45234 + 46313 = 91547 votesCurrent Rating: 45234 + 46313 = 91547 votes 46313

[396] 14: Hey, come on
12644 Current Rating: 12644 + 13976 = 26620 votesCurrent Rating: 12644 + 13976 = 26620 votes 13976

[395] 12: Cheer up, you look miserable
68481 Current Rating: 68481 + 71092 = 139573 votesCurrent Rating: 68481 + 71092 = 139573 votes 71092

[394] 11: Welcome to our clinic
11567 Current Rating: 11567 + 16183 = 27750 votesCurrent Rating: 11567 + 16183 = 27750 votes 16183

[393] 8: Congratulations, you’re pregnant!
10606 Current Rating: 10606 + 12518 = 23124 votesCurrent Rating: 10606 + 12518 = 23124 votes 12518

[392] 6: My wife has a slight impediment
12809 Current Rating: 12809 + 19760 = 32569 votesCurrent Rating: 12809 + 19760 = 32569 votes 19760

[391] 5: Can I borrow your bicycle?
10748 Current Rating: 10748 + 10944 = 21692 votesCurrent Rating: 10748 + 10944 = 21692 votes 10944

[390] 4: What are you doing?
10328 Current Rating: 10328 + 11359 = 21687 votesCurrent Rating: 10328 + 11359 = 21687 votes 11359

[389] 1: Welcome to The Phancy Phone Shop
16779 Current Rating: 16779 + 18214 = 34993 votesCurrent Rating: 16779 + 18214 = 34993 votes 18214


Mar 2011
[388] 31: Can we try something
13721 Current Rating: 13721 + 14659 = 28380 votesCurrent Rating: 13721 + 14659 = 28380 votes 14659

[387] 30: How is your meal so far?
13887 Current Rating: 13887 + 13876 = 27763 votesCurrent Rating: 13887 + 13876 = 27763 votes 13876

[386] 28: I’m always amazed
25240 Current Rating: 25240 + 27202 = 52442 votesCurrent Rating: 25240 + 27202 = 52442 votes 27202

[385] 25: Can you please call security
16737 Current Rating: 16737 + 19321 = 36058 votesCurrent Rating: 16737 + 19321 = 36058 votes 19321

[384] 24: I don`t know how you can be so stupid
41846 Current Rating: 41846 + 45941 = 87787 votesCurrent Rating: 41846 + 45941 = 87787 votes 45941

[383] 23: This book says
11929 Current Rating: 11929 + 13463 = 25392 votesCurrent Rating: 11929 + 13463 = 25392 votes 13463

[382] 22: Tell your mother
12593 Current Rating: 12593 + 15484 = 28077 votesCurrent Rating: 12593 + 15484 = 28077 votes 15484

[381] 18: I know I`m never going to understand women
17512 Current Rating: 17512 + 19424 = 36936 votesCurrent Rating: 17512 + 19424 = 36936 votes 19424

[380] 17: My daughter told me to cancel her allowance
20717 Current Rating: 20717 + 31488 = 52205 votesCurrent Rating: 20717 + 31488 = 52205 votes 31488

[379] 16: Why aren`t you married yet?
14536 Current Rating: 14536 + 14943 = 29479 votesCurrent Rating: 14536 + 14943 = 29479 votes 14943

[378] 14: Welcome Good Video Hire
22585 Current Rating: 22585 + 25886 = 48471 votesCurrent Rating: 22585 + 25886 = 48471 votes 25886

[377] 11: To be happy with a man
23096 Current Rating: 23096 + 22327 = 45423 votesCurrent Rating: 23096 + 22327 = 45423 votes 22327

[376] 10: It`s our 50th anniversary
17119 Current Rating: 17119 + 19962 = 37081 votesCurrent Rating: 17119 + 19962 = 37081 votes 19962

[375] 9: It was nice meeting someone so sensitive
17719 Current Rating: 17719 + 17624 = 35343 votesCurrent Rating: 17719 + 17624 = 35343 votes 17624

[374] 8: Your pizza is ready
13744 Current Rating: 13744 + 14622 = 28366 votesCurrent Rating: 13744 + 14622 = 28366 votes 14622

[373] 7: I was banned from that internet dating site
12910 Current Rating: 12910 + 20130 = 33040 votesCurrent Rating: 12910 + 20130 = 33040 votes 20130

[372] 3: Why do you call your wife
19883 Current Rating: 19883 + 21744 = 41627 votesCurrent Rating: 19883 + 21744 = 41627 votes 21744

[371] 1: Marriage is like a deck of cards...
25497 Current Rating: 25497 + 28527 = 54024 votesCurrent Rating: 25497 + 28527 = 54024 votes 28527


Feb 2011
[370] 28: What are you reading?
20357 Current Rating: 20357 + 22238 = 42595 votesCurrent Rating: 20357 + 22238 = 42595 votes 22238

[369] 25: Drinks are on me!
13372 Current Rating: 13372 + 15031 = 28403 votesCurrent Rating: 13372 + 15031 = 28403 votes 15031

[368] 24: Dad! I got a part in our school play!
12712 Current Rating: 12712 + 14128 = 26840 votesCurrent Rating: 12712 + 14128 = 26840 votes 14128

[367] 23: I got an email today from a bored local housewife
13362 Current Rating: 13362 + 16953 = 30315 votesCurrent Rating: 13362 + 16953 = 30315 votes 16953

[366] 22: You look like crap
12017 Current Rating: 12017 + 16961 = 28978 votesCurrent Rating: 12017 + 16961 = 28978 votes 16961

[365] 21: Hey, what are you doing with that gun?
19897 Current Rating: 19897 + 20228 = 40125 votesCurrent Rating: 19897 + 20228 = 40125 votes 20228

[364] 17: The difference between my car and my wife
21129 Current Rating: 21129 + 24566 = 45695 votesCurrent Rating: 21129 + 24566 = 45695 votes 24566

[363] 16: What happened to him?
15736 Current Rating: 15736 + 18310 = 34046 votesCurrent Rating: 15736 + 18310 = 34046 votes 18310

[362] 15: What was shopping like
13249 Current Rating: 13249 + 14318 = 27567 votesCurrent Rating: 13249 + 14318 = 27567 votes 14318

[361] 14: Bring me a beer from the fridge
10973 Current Rating: 10973 + 10983 = 21956 votesCurrent Rating: 10973 + 10983 = 21956 votes 10983

[360] 9: Why do you supposed PETA don’t moan about
12712 Current Rating: 12712 + 13961 = 26673 votesCurrent Rating: 12712 + 13961 = 26673 votes 13961

[359] 8: Happy Birthday Son!
10847 Current Rating: 10847 + 13553 = 24400 votesCurrent Rating: 10847 + 13553 = 24400 votes 13553

[358] 7: That will be R197.23, would you like a plastic bag?
17583 Current Rating: 17583 + 21266 = 38849 votesCurrent Rating: 17583 + 21266 = 38849 votes 21266

[357] 4: In all my time on the bench
21840 Current Rating: 21840 + 25023 = 46863 votesCurrent Rating: 21840 + 25023 = 46863 votes 25023

[356] 3: What are you doing?
10634 Current Rating: 10634 + 10234 = 20868 votesCurrent Rating: 10634 + 10234 = 20868 votes 10234

[355] 2: So your baby is nearly due
16311 Current Rating: 16311 + 16992 = 33303 votesCurrent Rating: 16311 + 16992 = 33303 votes 16992

[354] 1: In the old days
13029 Current Rating: 13029 + 15937 = 28966 votesCurrent Rating: 13029 + 15937 = 28966 votes 15937


Jan 2011
[353] 31: What’s the difference between
16301 Current Rating: 16301 + 17725 = 34026 votesCurrent Rating: 16301 + 17725 = 34026 votes 17725

[352] 27: Good morning and welcome
12314 Current Rating: 12314 + 11723 = 24037 votesCurrent Rating: 12314 + 11723 = 24037 votes 11723

[351] 26: Is this a picture of your wife, sir?
9269 Current Rating: 9269 + 8586 = 17855 votesCurrent Rating: 9269 + 8586 = 17855 votes 8586

[350] 25: My wife is getting really fat
9323 Current Rating: 9323 + 10560 = 19883 votesCurrent Rating: 9323 + 10560 = 19883 votes 10560

[349] 21: Grandpa, how old are you?
12273 Current Rating: 12273 + 12606 = 24879 votesCurrent Rating: 12273 + 12606 = 24879 votes 12606

[348] 20: Mom, why don’t you drink?
20322 Current Rating: 20322 + 21667 = 41989 votesCurrent Rating: 20322 + 21667 = 41989 votes 21667

[347] 19: Left a bit...
10681 Current Rating: 10681 + 12320 = 23001 votesCurrent Rating: 10681 + 12320 = 23001 votes 12320

[346] 18: We’ve been going out for a bit now
10884 Current Rating: 10884 + 10070 = 20954 votesCurrent Rating: 10884 + 10070 = 20954 votes 10070

[345] 14: Darling, I wished I had met you 20 years ago
11377 Current Rating: 11377 + 11334 = 22711 votesCurrent Rating: 11377 + 11334 = 22711 votes 11334

[344] 13: I saw the results of a sex survey yesterday
11224 Current Rating: 11224 + 13845 = 25069 votesCurrent Rating: 11224 + 13845 = 25069 votes 13845

[343] 12: You look so smart, why are you crying?
15965 Current Rating: 15965 + 28067 = 44032 votesCurrent Rating: 15965 + 28067 = 44032 votes 28067

[342] 11: I wish my girlfriend was more like a light bulb
10937 Current Rating: 10937 + 10328 = 21265 votesCurrent Rating: 10937 + 10328 = 21265 votes 10328

[341] 10: You and your penis are like a cell-phone
14251 Current Rating: 14251 + 17399 = 31650 votesCurrent Rating: 14251 + 17399 = 31650 votes 17399






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