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Dec 2011
[561] 23: I found out what my husband bought me for Christmas
103684    104978
[560] 22: Another Viagra advert on TV
31090 31811
[559] 21: It is so hard for women
105440 105804
[558] 20: Give me a double anything
105193 106660
[557] 19: Save a cow
104842 106093
[556] 15: You know the idiom
48129 44571
[555] 14: I am here to fulfil your
83797 84317
[554] 13: I heard you dumped your boyfriend
35315 41832
[553] 12: Modern industry is so inconsiderate
152057 148808
[552] 9: Bugger, what happened to you?
92144 93515
[551] 8: I`m off, see you tomorrow
113474 112542
[550] 7: My wife is like an alarm clock
146529 146238
[549] 6: Can I buy you a drink?
125739 124459
[548] 5: Mom, can we get a kitten
39653 42637
[547] 1: I think all of those people
132775 131741
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Nov 2011
[546] 30: Do you know what the worst thing in the world is?
102046 101728
[545] 29: Hi bud, how are you doing?
115619 113519
[544] 25: This political correctness is getting out of hand
79384 79835
[543] 24: The more I get to understand men
118187 117500
[542] 23: Have you noticed
68848 67574
[541] 22: I can’t believe it
83579 81409
[540] 21: How did you get the black eye?
87179 85383
[539] 18: Happy birthday darling
110293 111634
[538] 17: A real man
39624 39898
[537] 16: I heard that he is a very successful man
153908 153389
[536] 15: Why do I always have to do the cooking?
96337 98783
[535] 14: You look furious, what is going on?
86145 87073
[534] 11: Thanks Google
75735 75967
[533] 10: Dad, I have a homework question
94065 93581
[532] 9: Look at that guy opening the car door for her
50985 50620
[531] 8: I often wonder why alcohol was ever invented
27453 26043
[530] 7: I heard you got dumped by your girlfriend
30505 29216
[529] 4: That`s a nice new phone
134782 114052
[528] 3: I was down at the security shop
108060 106586
[527] 2: Good morning, how can I help you?
97045 97627
[526] 1: I was watching my 8 year old son
45667 43436
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Oct 2011
[525] 31: Why do people say
62143 60800
[524] 28: YOU will make supper for a change
40338 40499
[523] 27: I have to be in court on Monday
43293 42837
[522] 26: Hey babe
19840 18982
[521] 25: Facebook asks me what I
101049 100314
[520] 24: My wife is so fat
47172 45477
[519] 21: I got banned from the disco
127817 126894
[518] 20: Are you coming out tonight?
44747 45031
[517] 19: I watched a disturbing documentary last night
84302 85127
[516] 18: I am in deep trouble again
60088 60299
[515] 17: Its going to be hell this winter
46425 44820
[514] 14: I`ve bought you six drinks already tonight
112765 113908
[513] 13: Smoking is bad for you
104220 102141
[512] 12: Take away all of the vowels
49732 47893
[511] 11: What the hell!?!
140151 142989
[510] 10: Please phone the sperm bank
101519 101474
[509] 7: I need to get out of the relationship I’m in
149600 152569
[508] 6: It’s been three weeks since the accident
77242 77299
[507] 5: These ads on TV for Viagra are stupid
81487 82319
[506] 4: I heard you were in trouble with the law
106584 106145
[505] 3: I`d like you to meet my little friend
53995 52812
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Sep 2011
[504] 30: Hey babe, why don’t you come over here
113452 112639
[503] 29: You’ve been walking strangely
28824 27513
[502] 28: Will you please bring me a beer
89829 89196
[501] 27: You`ve been sulking for an hour now, what’s wrong?
63937 64138
[500] 26: What do you call that fatty bit
70467 71776
[499] 23: You need to cut down
34879 35564
[498] 22: My wife has a terrible hangover
54439 53044
[497] 21: A little girl knocked on my door this morning
55681 52561
[496] 20: Johnny Walker, single
28646 27436
[495] 19: You’ll never guess what happened to me
112924 111253
[494] 16: I’m so lucky my husband’s an angel
118735 116804
[493] 15: Are you going to be long?
57487 57097
[492] 14: The divorce proceedings are underway
41690 40442
[491] 13: We both got parts in the Christmas pageant
38791 36935
[490] 12: MWWAAAHHH!
91965 93070
[489] 9: Have you ever been to a sex shop?
116458 114690
[488] 8: I went to the gynaecologist
91893 90640
[487] 7: Faceless supports the Springboks!
47667 47482
[486] 6: I’m ready, we can go
114469 113526
[485] 5: I’ve called my wife beautiful
97680 98325
[484] 2: You said you were going to complain
132684 132987
[483] 1: With you being over two metres tall
62682 62248
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Aug 2011
[482] 31: You look tired
111886 110490
[481] 30: Since I first laid eyes on you
37715 35226
[480] 29: I love Edward Cullen
114385 109393
[479] 26: Have you seen my broom anywhere?
113474 111910
[478] 25: My gay son introduced my wife and I
93751 90758
[477] 24: Happy birthday Dad
120941 123244
[476] 23: I heard you broke up with your boyfriend
107645 105254
[475] 22: Do you believe in psychics?
145915 145169
[474] 19: My wife is suing me for a divorce
128159 126367
[473] 18: I haven’t seen you around in months
123771 123497
[472] 17: I’m from the orphanage in town
94256 92296
[471] 16: I was shagging this bird
41639 41055
[470] 15: Now that we’re engaged
43792 44093
[469] 12: You lying, cheating bastard
67846 67485
[468] 11: I think I’m getting old
25747 26188
[467] 10: I can’t believe you missed that putt
46479 47021
[466] 5: Hi there gorgeous
103383 102273
[465] 4: I discovered three things today
63766 62513
[464] 3: You know, I love oral sex
102357 101987
[463] 2: Happy Anniversary! How long is it now?
40704 43610
[462] 1: Things seem a bit frosty here today
193887 193217
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Jul 2011
[461] 29: I heard you have to go to court, why?
106747 106763
[460] 28: So your wife told my wife
103487 104932
[459] 27: Good morning Professor
87901 88903
[458] 26: So what do the results say doctor?
52522 57854
[457] 25: I realised that my wife
115535 117134
[456] 22: I’ve met that most wonderful, sexy, intelligent woman
101018 101103
[455] 21: We are gathered here today
349086 395436
[454] 20: You look flipping angry
105047 102865
[453] 19: That’s just disgusting ...
84638 87824
[452] 18: I think you should see a doctor
75523 74145
[451] 15: You women are so vain
93215 90405
[450] 14: Did you know that 95% of women masturbate
114568 115915
[449] 13: So you’re crying again
40223 47621
[448] 12: She’s hot
62870 62952
[447] 11: You know we have many terms for male masturbation
82221 80950
[446] 8: So beautiful, what do you do for a living?
23541 23312
[445] 7: Hi, I’m from tech support
77141 77856
[444] 6: Dad, does a lawyer ever tell the truth?
63971 62797
[443] 5: You’re in the video game, I need a favour
63287 63109
[442] 4: A woman marries a man
81375 82165
[441] 1: You look buggered, rough night last night?
60351 62146
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Jun 2011
[440] 29: I’m really not happy
88389 86823
[439] 28: My condolences, I heard your husband passed away
68545 70533
[438] 27: I found a new "feminine hygiene" product
1052012 371400
[437] 24: Hi there, can I buy you a drink?
136888 135982
[436] 23: You look like you could chew rocks
125283 125393
[435] 22: We live in such dangerous and uncertain times
123616 123489
[434] 21: If you went camping
75187 73562
[433] 20: Hey babsh, you"re looking fantashtic tonight
5865 6895
[432] 15: Welcome to the Fitness Gym
203509 207278
[431] 14: I saw a news program
99311 100761
[430] 13: I can’t find my wife anywhere
98690 99077
[429] 10: I bought my wife a Memory Stick
69682 67615
[428] 9: Today’s lesson is about the Bible
129103 143494
[427] 8: Darling, do I please you in bed?
154923 156139
[426] 7: I got into huge trouble with the wife
78381 76974
[425] 6: My wife left me last Wednesday
51557 50410
[424] 3: Doctor, I’ve got a green spot
37928 37985
[423] 2: Good morning, this is Hospitality Hotel
85922 88880
[422] 1: You logged a call for IT support
96415 98530
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May 2011
[421] 31: Dad! What are you doing to mom?
58210 56905
[420] 30: My girlfriend and I were in bed
28991 33416
[419] 27: You reported your wife missing
3842 3355
[418] 26: Dad, how much does it cost to get married?
93195 94858
[417] 25: When you die, you get reincarnated
96956 94825
[416] 24: My wife is so stupid
32772 34793
[415] 23: Went for my routine check up today
84536 87338
[414] 20: My girlfriend thinks that I
67203 68606
[413] 19: I hate the flipping internet!
36690 37999
[412] 17: Emergency services, how can I help you?
81448 88982
[411] 16: I got so embarrassed
56172 55548
[410] 13: You’re looking up-beat today
63163 62895
[409] 12: Welcome to Incredible Ice-Cream Parlour
61570 70785
[408] 11: I`m 79 years old now
39385 38290
[407] 10: I met a girl in the park
42871 42267
[406] 9: Dad, I hear you
117936 119753
[405] 6: Are you growing a moustache
87206 88020
[404] 5: Hi doc, I need a medical clearance
55673 57130
[403] 4: Hello Gran, I started school
118266 119837
[402] 3: Thanks for posting my bail
59200 59907
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Apr 2011
[401] 21: Good morning, I’m from IT support
72605 73253
[400] 20: I just hired an Eastern European cleaner
100880 100498
[399] 19: Welcome Fine Dinning Restaurant
103566 104345
[398] 18: What is it when a man talks
93557 95104
[397] 15: I Love you
118076 118421
[396] 14: Hey, come on
39777 40503
[395] 12: Cheer up, you look miserable
120368 121634
[394] 11: Welcome to our clinic
45362 52071
[393] 8: Congratulations, you’re pregnant!
71084 72205
[392] 6: My wife has a slight impediment
41611 54682
[391] 5: Can I borrow your bicycle?
105447 105325
[390] 4: What are you doing?
87567 88241
[389] 1: Welcome to The Phancy Phone Shop
92722 92765
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Mar 2011
[388] 31: Can we try something
66940 66799
[387] 30: How is your meal so far?
83108 81442
[386] 28: I’m always amazed
39986 40762
[385] 25: Can you please call security
123611 125425
[384] 24: I don`t know how you can be so stupid
57398 65395
[383] 23: This book says
51557 52639
[382] 22: Tell your mother
51396 54877
[381] 18: I know I`m never going to understand women
129257 130398
[380] 17: My daughter told me to cancel her allowance
1019142 417471
[379] 16: Why aren`t you married yet?
100833 101074
[378] 14: Welcome Good Video Hire
103709 103272
[377] 11: To be happy with a man
149654 146701
[376] 10: It`s our 50th anniversary
118631 117584
[375] 9: It was nice meeting someone so sensitive
117550 116432
[374] 8: Your pizza is ready
78323 78328
[373] 7: I was banned from that internet dating site
86153 98012
[372] 3: Why do you call your wife
79232 80768
[371] 1: Marriage is like a deck of cards...
47686 49789
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Feb 2011
[370] 28: What are you reading?
91838 93026
[369] 25: Drinks are on me!
68531 69995
[368] 24: Dad! I got a part in our school play!
112156 111922
[367] 23: I got an email today from a bored local housewife
41493 41826
[366] 22: You look like crap
44592 51459
[365] 21: Hey, what are you doing with that gun?
31266 30766
[364] 17: The difference between my car and my wife
134541 135445
[363] 16: What happened to him?
54021 55632
[362] 15: What was shopping like
26579 27341
[361] 14: Bring me a beer from the fridge
79959 79206
[360] 9: Why do you supposed PETA don’t moan about
92808 93435
[359] 8: Happy Birthday Son!
57220 58901
[358] 7: That will be R197.23, would you like a plastic bag?
71235 78897
[357] 4: In all my time on the bench
113603 116102
[356] 3: What are you doing?
29442 27928
[355] 2: So your baby is nearly due
73500 74976
[354] 1: In the old days
115051 118022
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Jan 2011
[353] 31: What’s the difference between
85630 86068
[352] 27: Good morning and welcome
82092 80859
[351] 26: Is this a picture of your wife, sir?
35383 33853
[350] 25: My wife is getting really fat
99648 100846
[349] 21: Grandpa, how old are you?
40805 35675
[348] 20: Mom, why don’t you drink?
56421 56625
[347] 19: Left a bit...
29077 31545
[346] 18: We’ve been going out for a bit now
104348 102863
[345] 14: Darling, I wished I had met you 20 years ago
83120 82646
[344] 13: I saw the results of a sex survey yesterday
73202 72093
[343] 12: You look so smart, why are you crying?
320813 343047
[342] 11: I wish my girlfriend was more like a light bulb
103533 102089
[341] 10: You and your penis are like a cell-phone
111996 110674
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